CLASSIC BOOK TITLES OR AUTHORS MODERNISED


I dragged the following off a dark shelf of my old blog, and dusted it off to place on display.  My current indisposition has me with my mind in a woolly-headed tangle and completely knit-witted…

Old books that once were justly famed

These days, should really be renamed –

The titles or the authors need

A tweak to bring them up to speed!

 Take ‘Sense and Sensibility’ –

More sense with ‘Sensuality’!

And Moby Dick would sell far more

With ‘Moby’s’ placed the ‘Dick’ before;

How ‘War and Peace’ sales would increase

If that were changed to ‘Whore and Piece’!

And William Shakespeare’s little tales

By ‘Willy Shag-spear’ would boost sales!

‘Doll’s Chickens’ should be on the list

As author for ‘The Oliver Twist’

(‘Sale of Two Titties’ often used –

I’ll leave that out; it’s been abused!);

‘Black Beauty’ was by Anna Sewell –

By Any Sewer would add fuel!

These names are just a random few –

Can anyone add one or two?

© 2008 Colonialist (24.com /blogs)

About colonialist

Active septic geranium who plays with words writing fantasy novels and professionally editing, with notes writing classical music, and with riding a mountain bike, horses and dinghies. Recently Indie Publishing has been added to this list.
This entry was posted in Nonsense verse, Really Awful Rhyme. Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to CLASSIC BOOK TITLES OR AUTHORS MODERNISED

  1. colonialist says:

    Indeed an interesting idea thread! With JM, I wonder if that was it!

    And Alas Pay-tons has a sequel ‘Weep the Neglected Land?’

    What about ‘Things Carry On Falling Apart’? China Ach-heebies.

    Like

  2. cindy says:

    I don’t believe I read this before, it’s wonderful.
    I can’t think of any, but did get a sort of idea thread: that pride and prejudice lead to shame and disgrace; but I guess it’s a South African thing, so I won’t make a poem of it.

    ps: Could JM Coetzee have cast about, eying his bookshelf, his eyes alighting on Pride & Prejudice, his mind searching for the opposite of prejudice. Could he have found Disgrace in his Oxford and thought: “Ha, that’s it, a fine title for a book”?

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