Currently, I am going through a session where nothing wants to go right and lots of things are determined to go wrong. The simple matter of ringing a telephone number to get an optician appointment, for example – the phone is engaged for ages. Then it does absolutely nothing. Then it finally rings and is answered, and they can’t hear me. They take my number somehow, repeat it accurately, and say they’ll phone me back. They don’t. I decide to try my relatively new mobile. Fully charged, but it won’t switch on. I travel to the far ends of the earth to collect a proof from the printers promised for today. It isn’t there. Neither is anyone responsible that I can vent my feelings on. Then a book format just wouldn’t stop going haywire in the PDF.
All this is typical of how today went, and I hope you are enjoying my pity party.
The day started so well, too. In my usual fashion, I woke up by plunging into what I have even more handy than the ocean which is out the other side – my trusty puddle. I bet you thought I’d post another of my bright blue sea – or even river – ones for the BLUE photo challenge? Nope, this is it:
Now, of course, the sort of day I’ve had makes the other WordPress topic of SWEARING rather appropriate. Did I do any of that? Not really.
I am a member of the fraternity that is convinced habitual swearing indicates a lack of intellect, a lack of vocabulary, and a lack of imagination. Also, a tendency towards exhibitionism. People who constantly swear are the ones who would go flashing if they had the nerve. Swearing is verbal flashing. ‘Ooh, hear how naughty I am!’
The pro-cussing crowd will point out in justification that a number of people who are actually respected for intellect, vocabulary and imagination are inveterate swearers. My response is that in that direction they are still demonstrating the lack of those assets, together with unforgivable laziness.
I concede that one can relieve annoyance and frustration by a verbal outburst. However, it doesn’t have to be confined to the tiny selection of words originating from blasphemy, (such as ‘bloody’), or relating to sex or sexual bits and pieces, or to bodily functions of the less pleasant kind. A little invention can come up with far more satisfying exclamations.
I remember with admiration some Coloured colleagues who had a wealth of invective consisting of quite innocent terms which were chosen because of having sounds which one could really inject volume and venom into. Immensely satisfying.
I do confess with shame, though, that on one notable occasion many years ago I spent about a week on taking apart, fixing, and reassembling, a cuckoo-clock of which we were very fond. Finally I completed the job, tested it, and proudly hung it on its peg in the wall – which came out. I looked at the bits and pieces all over the floor, and said, ‘Sh..!!’ with great feeling. The whole family came running in utter shock, and still speak of it to this day.
It was, however, a mind-numbing experience and I think that reverting to something so unimaginative on that one occasion was justified.
© Colonialist April 2012 (WordPress/Letterdash)