Figtree 4

Somewhere in this tree …

  Here we have some rare pictures of a Treelopperis Natalensis, an unusual  type of ape which clambers around in Ficus (wild fig) trees and chews large chunks off them. the Mad Lopper ...

…is the Mad Lopper …

Figtree 3

… like, right there!

   Our pool beneath the tree was becoming like fig soup one minute, or completely covered in Adam and Eve garments the next, so I had to do a lot of enjoyable tree-climbing on Sunday.   It was long overdue.

  I managed to avoid coming down again by the fastest method. This, in spite of the fact that starting a big chainsaw while standing in a tree is quite an art.  One needs both hands for the operation, so holding on is not an option.   One also needs enough space for an elbow to jerk viciously quite a way behind one’s back.  A branch in the way of such elbow, after a furious pull at the cord, means the funny- bone loses all sense of humour.  Thus, a combination of a carefully chosen stance and a good sense of balance is essential.

  Clearing up branches too heavy to lift out of the pool also provided some interesting problems.  The manufacturers of chainsaws don’t seem to have designed one that works under water.  I had to yank the ends of large branches out and lop them off bit by bit on the pool edge to reduce them to bite-sized chunks.

  There is still a lot to go, but I have made a pretty good start.

 © February 2013 Colonialist (WordPress)

About colonialist

Active septic geranium who plays with words writing fantasy novels and professionally editing, with notes writing classical music, and with riding a mountain bike, horses and dinghies. Recently Indie Publishing has been added to this list.
This entry was posted in Gardens, Nature, Personal Journal, Photography and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.


  1. Tokeloshe says:

    You sure are getting a lot of exercise 😉


  2. adeeyoyo says:

    That’s why monkeys have tails – a third arm with which to hold and steady themselves. Good job though, Col. You’ve done a magnificent job – considering… 😀


  3. adinparadise says:

    You look very good up that three, Col. Glad to see that you’re hale and hearty like hubby. The two of you could wipe the floor with some men half your age. 😀


  4. Arkenaten says:

    let’s if this works,
    I pray you bear with me,
    Which I’m sure you will agree is better than baring with me


  5. Arkenaten says:

    I am notorious for falling out of or falling off of ladders, trees, windows etc. I avoid shoes or boots with heels for similar reasons.

    These days I preach the au natural with the meme, “Let it grow, let it grow let it grow” ( sung to to the tune of, Let it Snow, let , let it snow, by Ole blue eyes) 🙂


    • colonialist says:

      Waving a snarling chain saw around is marvellously conducive in focussing the mind towards not allowing any missteps! If I let it grow, then I cannot leaf well enough alone, and when those things moult they do it with passion.


  6. The Asian says:

    You discovered a new species! You’re gonna be famous! 😉
    You’re still so energetic. My dad would never do anything like that


  7. Pussycat44 says:

    I have to hire a Treelopperis and I don’t mind that he comes from Gautengelensis. He has to make a plan with the not-so Speedy, uncaring neighbourensis to get rid of the overgrown “stuff” from their side.
    What poses in a tree and grins like a Cheshire cat? The Bluffing Colonialist.


  8. Harmony says:

    “Adam and Eve garments …” I am sooo re-leaved that the fashions have changed over time 😉

    I have vertigo just seeing the pics of you way up high – you’ve very brave. No wait, you had it right above … BONKERS!


    • colonialist says:

      There were advantages, though. New outfits for free whenever you wanted them, quick to get on or off , and they come with their own glue. The colour range is, admittedly, a bit limited.
      Hey, you didn’t HAVE to agree with me!


  9. optie says:

    The last time a Treelopperis Capensis was seen up a tree in our neck of the woods it ended badly with Treelopperis, ladder and chainsaw on the ground beneath the tree. Treelopperis Assistentis was also caught in the decent and a couple of black eyes were sported by both species for a few days.


  10. 68ghia says:

    Are you cutting down a whole tree?
    Suppose it makes a mess in the pool. Which why I don’t have a pool – like my trees way too much. Probably also the fact that I hardly ever swim 😉
    HOpe you get done what you have to without too many injuries.
    And maybe you can tie a rope to the end you’re cutting off and sort of swing it to a side not in the pool?


  11. Wow, but you are a brave Treelopperis Natalensis.
    PS. You didn’t like my “capshun?” I was joking ya know, you may delete it 🙂


  12. melouisef says:

    Can you get treelopperis at any petshop or only those in Natal?


  13. It takes some confidence to tackle a project like that! And you dress very nicely for tough garden work…I wouldn’t allow any photos of either my husband or I while we work about. 🙂 I hope the project ended well? It looked like a very preciously placed job! 🙂


    • colonialist says:

      Those are old clothes, expendable when they got full of sticky sap. A gooey white substance is a feature of those trees. Many branches were removed, but there are still some big ones to go.


  14. newsferret says:

    You are energetic to do that yourself.


  15. nrhatch says:

    Amazing! I couldn’t start a chain saw on solid ground . . . much less in a tree.


  16. d1nx says:

    Wow Col, that’s hectic work for a septic geranium!!! I’m really’re more than versatile – can’t think of a word that describes you, at this time of night. LOL.
    Sleep tight!


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