Really Awful Short Story (Flash Fiction 100)


ericjohnbaker has issued a challenge to write the most gosh-awful short story not exceeding 100 words.  I hope I have avoided Mozart’s error when he wrote his ‘Musical Joke’ lampooning talentless composers. Despite himself he produced some good music even with all the deliberate errors, so the joke was on him.  However, I don’t think this ghastly effort has a single virtue:


It was a dark and stromy nite

Whoa is me I am lost” Jane, pronounced ringing her hands;

The tall dark hansome man rushed, up eagley “I found you and towns; thattaway’ he pronounced, 

Janet saw the moon glint in his wavey fare hare and on his sparking teeth  he was tall and hansome and good looking.  Seeing Jaynes’ beautiful body and beautiful eyes and beautiful legs and clasped her to his bosom.  Falling in love it was more than the temptation could resist.

Then braking lose; “mans gotta do-”  

As he road into the sunset Joan missed him forever.

© Colonialist September 2013 (WordPress)



About colonialist

Active septic geranium who plays with words writing fantasy novels and professionally editing, with notes writing classical music, and with riding a mountain bike, horses and dinghies. Recently Indie Publishing has been added to this list.
This entry was posted in Challenge, Flash Fiction, Language, Parody, Really Awful Joke, Short story, Writing and tagged , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

42 Responses to Really Awful Short Story (Flash Fiction 100)

  1. adeeyoyo says:

    Well, well… who would have thought, Col! Loverly 😀


  2. adinparadise says:

    Hehehe…… This is two dreadfull for wurds, Col. The “sparking teeth” really got my imagination going. 🙂


  3. You have written an excellent entry for the challenge, Col! 😉


  4. Um…

    Dear Col, thank you so much for the offer to let me steal your story. I think I’ll pass. Love, Tilly x

    😉 You should definitely win!


  5. 68ghia says:

    Yes well…
    Awful sure, but not unreadable like the letter I got the other day written by a true idiot, and not one just play-acting 😉


  6. Arkenaten says:

    Freaking awesome! Hosed myself.

    This sounds like ariel Platerlander wot is trying to rite inglish.


  7. calmgrove says:

    Tehy say, dno’t tehy, taht if you jmulbe up the ltetres beweten the frist and lsat in a lnog wrod it wlil slitl be lieblge…


  8. cecilia says:

    LOVED the spelling! braking loose!! excellent, most dreadful.. mission accomplished and fun too i think! c


    • colonialist says:

      Ah, you scared me there for a minute, but I did actually have ‘braking lose’. It is amazing the way the mind substitutes the correct forms without one realising it – I wonder how many of the errors have simply become invisible?
      Glad you thought it was fun!


  9. granny1947 says:

    Truly awful…well done. 🙂


  10. The Asian says:

    The scarey ting is menee of our studints wud have past engleesh if they submited this


  11. bulldog says:

    This is Gosh awful alright…


  12. cobbies69 says:

    my oh my i can get my head easily in a twist reading this gosh awful stuff.. heehee! love it by the way 😉


  13. I was in tiers at the end


  14. Pussycat44 says:

    A Gr 8 English teacher’s nightmare!


  15. nrhatch says:

    Your spell-checker is upchucking right now. :mrgreen:


  16. Mr. Atheist says:

    That’s great comedy ryt thare.


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