REALLY AWFULLY FLIGHTFUL FLYDAY WHINE


Wine with flyOn the NaPoWriMo prompt of Love and Wine:

I was slurping my much-adored ration of wine
And, all in all, feeling that things were just fine,
When something soft suddenly buzzed in my mouth –
I only just stopped it from going down south!
I spat out with vigour and there in the glass
A fly I espied, doing breast-stoke with class.

In these sorts of cases some options arise.
For, after recovering from the surprise,
I know there are some folk who would not have spat,
But simply ingested whatever ‘twas that
Had entered their tipple, and then carried on
As if nothing strange down their gullet had gone.

And yet other ones, if they spewed the thing out,
Would glug it back down, with no shadow of doubt;
While others would fish it out, flick it away,
And carry on drinking, all happy and gay –
But of these fine fellows the ones nearly worst
Are those that suck all of the wine off it first.

But worst of all are, with no question at all –
The ones who have habits must surely appal –
Whose love of their vino is so very great,
That loss of a smidgeon they won’t tolerate,
So, wholly disgustingly, quick as a wink,
They squeeze the fly thoroughly into their drink.

House fly

The option of turfing the bathing-wine out
Is certainly one that is followed, no doubt;
My own love’s too great for it going to waste –
Such trespassing never affected the taste –
So after disposing of any such fly,
I’m a carry-on-drinking-it sort of a guy!

© Colonialist April 2014 (WordPress)
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About colonialist

Active septic geranium who plays with words writing fantasy novels and professionally editing, with notes writing classical music, and with riding a mountain bike, horses and dinghies.
This entry was posted in Challenge, Humour, Poems, Really Awful Rhyme and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

44 Responses to REALLY AWFULLY FLIGHTFUL FLYDAY WHINE

  1. My granddad would have said “A bit of extra protein is good for you.” I’m a bit squeamish about goggas swimming around in my drink. I would have passed it to hubby, who has no such qualms, and would have done the same as yourself.

    Like

  2. Ruth2Day says:

    yuk! squeezing the fly out! tell me you don’t do this?

    Like

  3. adeeyoyo says:

    Yuk! I would have done the same as Happy Hugger! Free protein or not. 😦

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  4. I really simply must admit that
    After reading the squeezing fly bit
    It all became quite a horror story for me
    With a positive ending though, I see
    At least the fly died happy
    With your thirst slaked indubitably

    Like

  5. The alcohol disinfects……surely………

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  6. Grannymar says:

    You have a mind like my brothers!

    Like

  7. The Asian says:

    I have no problem with flicking and then carry on drinking. What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger right? 😉

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  8. LOL!!!!! 😀 thanks for the laugh. I would have thrown it out and poured a new glass 😀

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  9. misswhiplash says:

    Yuck
    .a good rhyme and well told
    But. On the subject I am not sold
    Not keen on vino anyway
    So i ,d have thrown the lot away

    Like

  10. I read this to Jock who said it reminded him of Eskimo Nell.
    Being of feminine gender and gently brought up
    I don’t know that rugbyman song at all well
    But your rhyming amused me
    at the same time, it confused me –
    I thought on the whole I would sup.

    Sorry about the wonky metre but I’ve been poeming all day, and am worn out.

    Like

  11. guyportman says:

    A brilliant poem. I hate finding flies in my wine, and always try to remove them immediately. I dearly hope I never come across those that suck all of the wine off it first.

    Like

  12. suzicate says:

    Wine is too precious to share with flies! Set a glass of juice out next time, ha! Glad you didn’t swallow him.

    Like

  13. nrhatch says:

    Spitting and sputtering
    Musing and muttering
    I’d toss out that fly
    In the blink of an eye
    Then carry on drinking!

    Like

  14. calmgrove says:

    Brilliant! And I don’t throw out such epithets lightly.

    Reminds me of the old joke:
    Q. What’s worse than finding a worm in your apple?
    A. Finding half a worm in your apple…

    Like

  15. Serena Malcolm says:

    Haha! Brilliant. This really made me chuckle. That’s a true love of wine right there!! Nicely done.

    Like

  16. hee hee. excellent. Must confess I did the very same thing as you the other day – oh not the great rhyming, but the flick it out and carry on drinking while dining!

    Like

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