REALLY AWFUL NONSENSE RHYMES

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And for today, the NaPoWriMo prompt is to ‘write a poem for children. This could be in the style of a nursery rhyme, or take a cue from Edward Lear or Shel Silverstein’.  This is write up my alley – so a selection:

FLOOGLES

A floogle is a funny beast,
All flopsy in its flight:
It doesn’t seem to be the least
Aer-o-dy-nam-clee right. 

Its take-offs are a miracle
Of mind transcending bulk;
Its landings are all spiracle –
And end up in a sulk. 

Its mating cry’s discor-dint
Enough to cause to flee
All creatures less impor-dint
Than female floogles, see? 

Its nests atop sharp spires
Are something of a farce,
Unless a chick desires
A spike thrust up his … (pass!) 

They feed upon the gormliss,
A silly creature which,
With body rather formless,
Is yet, in protein, rich. 

So if you spot a floogle
Just let the creature be,
And satisfy, in Google,
Your curiosity. 

Don’t go near floogles, please, you!
The chances are they may
Come swooping down to seize you –
Mistaken for their prey.

TURTLE DISASTER

Turtles are a kind of tortoise
That all live under the wortoise;
Turtles through these waters race
For they move in car-apace!
In the ocean see her hurtle –
Should you flip ‘er, she’s turned turtle …
Turtles, right way up, must be
Mock ones, therefore, you agree?
Turtles are a sorry group –
Often land up in the soup.

© Colonialist April 2014 (WordPress)