A Really Awfully Friendly Cockroach


NaPoWriMo Day Twenty Six prompts: ‘write a persona poem – a poem in the voice of someone else’ so here goes:

Cockroach

Hi there! I’m Cocky – I’m a roach…
Why do you shrink at my approach?
Why is it you don’t like me moach?
Why don’t you want me here?

I’m inexpensive to maintain:
Odd scraps; for residence a drain;
And really, it should be most plain
I’m quite a little dear!

So would some person please explain
Why everybody goes insane,
And absolutely raises Cain,
The minute I am near?

What is it that you have to gain
From causing roaches so much pain?
I’m cute and cuddly, in the main,
So why this stupid fear?

You shudder at my slightest toach,
And seem to think your food I’d poach,
As if I ever would encroach! …
Do you still want this beer? …

Why are you reaching for that shoe?
What is it that you’re going to do – ?
Eeeek! Aaargh! No! Please! *BANG-squish!* … I’m through …
*And he’s no longer here.*

The above represents a repost of something that I now realise appeared as recently as October.  That won’t do, so I am adding another, written after return from dining out with friends.

A Really Awful Cock-(roach)-Crow.

Flying Cockroach

Though I am quite often maligned
By humans so far less refined,
Think: I will survive
When no human’s alive –
I am so much better designed! 

I have quite a vanishing trick
When bashed at with shoe or with stick,
It hits in a place
Which has just become space –
I am unbelievably quick! 

When into dark cupboards you look
To unearth a much-beloved book,
It may have occurred
I’ve devoured every word,
And therefrom all knowledge I took! 

For if you don’t leave me enough
Of all of the rubbishy stuff,
It simply will mean
I will take what is clean –
Your own fault for making life rough! 

And keep all insecticide out;
It just doesn’t help, there is no doubt:
Remarkably soon,
We will be quite immune,
And all of your efforts will flout.

© Colonialist 2015 (WordPress)
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About colonialist

Active septic geranium who plays with words writing fantasy novels and professionally editing, with notes writing classical music, and with riding a mountain bike, horses and dinghies.
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38 Responses to A Really Awfully Friendly Cockroach

  1. Tokeloshe says:

    That’s one thing I don’t miss 😉

    Like

  2. When I was in Sydney I worked in catering and at one point I was in the kitchens at one of the breweries. Sadly I got to clean the ovens, how people didn’t manage to end up with roast cockroach in their meals was beyond me.

    But the years passed and they were cockroach free. Coming to Spain meant all sorts of new exotic insects and beasties like geckos and chameleons. No cockies. We did have a little cute thing in the bathroom that I chatted to and it waved its antennae at me in response. I called my pet The Naked Lunch Creature. After some considerable time, the penny finally dropped as I realised the reason I had named it thus was because it was indeed a cockroach. Whereupon I screamed and totally went off my pet. Interesting how our perceptions are coloured. Ignorance was truly bliss.

    Liked by 1 person

    • colonialist says:

      And realisation was horror! 🙂
      They have had a truly bad press. Actually, it appears that many of their labels are not accurate, and people who keep them as pets *shudder* get quite passionate about them.
      Even knowing all that, though, I still get instinctive revulsion at the sight of them.

      Like

  3. First, who but you would write such an excellent poem about a cockroach?

    Second, while I lived in Washington. D.C. I left a cup of coffee (black) on the counter for a little too long. I took a sip and felt something in my mouth. When I spit out the “something,” I saw that it was a cockroach. Talk about YUCK! I only drink tea now and I keep my mug with me at all times!

    Like

  4. El Rolyat says:

    Oh! I love them both! (your poems, not the roaches). Very witty indeed 😀

    Like

  5. You know, I actually liked the first one best. It had an almost childish quality to it that made Cocky endearing. Almost cuddly:)

    Liked by 1 person

  6. bulldog says:

    It is the shoe or “Doom”
    should it enter my room,
    begone creepy roach
    do not the Bulldog approach…

    Like

  7. Patrecia (with an E) says:

    I love the added bit.How on earth did you come up with the idea of writing poems about cockroaches

    Like

  8. All I can say is “ew.”

    Like

  9. I opened this post, screamed and scared poor MTM to death.

    Like

  10. CC Champagne says:

    Love it! If that’s just something you scribbled on the go, you should write more in a hurry! 😉

    Like

  11. Good response to the persona prompt. But I couldn’t love a cockroach!

    Like

  12. Grannymar says:

    I suppose there has to be one good side to our cold weather (It tried to snow this morning) the roaches leave us alone.

    Like

  13. I never thought I’d feel sorry for a cockroach 😄

    Like

  14. Ow haha, that poor little Cocky! 😀

    Like

  15. Patrecia (with an E) says:

    Hello Cocky, you’re a croach,
    I look at you .
    from a distant approach
    To your mom you may look very dear
    But to me I sadly fear
    You are ugly, sorry to say
    Your antenna points a different way
    You creep in the dark, along the boards
    And probably give my food to your hoards
    So should I see you in my home
    I would squirt with killer foam
    Not an end that you want it to be
    So stay away from me and you will be free

    Liked by 1 person

  16. Pussycat44 says:

    The equivalent of the Parktown Prawn!

    Like

  17. ceadomile says:

    It put a big smile on my face 🙂

    Like

    • colonialist says:

      I’m glad, and hope there might be another if you revisit my post and see a further rhyme I have freshly written (I came to realise that I had already posted the other one as recently as October last year, so that wasn’t good enough).

      Like

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