A Really Awful Fair Way to a Striking Sea-ne

Umdoni Park Golf Course

Umdoni Park, Natal South Coast,
On forest birding stroll –
The strangest birds this place can boast
Hit balls towards that pole!
A whole in ‘won’ is offered here,
For golfers to enjoy,
But drive your ball too far, I fear
Your caddie needs a buoy
To help retrieve the wretched thing:
The water-hazard there
Does tend to be quite interest-ting –
Conducive to despair –
In front of it, I must point out,
A sand-trap’s to be found
Far worse than bunkers all about –
Sun-bathers there abound!
Perhaps you should give up the game
Of which you are so fond;
Scratch off, from playing lists, your name,
And paddle in that pond!

© Colonialist October 2015 (WordPress)


About colonialist

Active septic geranium who plays with words writing fantasy novels and professionally editing, with notes writing classical music, and with riding a mountain bike, horses and dinghies. Recently Indie Publishing has been added to this list.
This entry was posted in Africa, Beach, Birds, Colonialist, Humorous rhyme, Personal Journal, Photography, Really Awful Rhyme, Wordplay and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

29 Responses to A Really Awful Fair Way to a Striking Sea-ne

  1. You wouldn’t want to paddle in the pond on our golf course here. There be alligators lying in wait for unsuspecting golfers, and they’re they’re certainly not piddly little ones. 😯


  2. Never understood the attraction of golf. I think it’s more fun just to walk around. Why complicate things with swinging a club to get an impossibly small ball into a tiny hole a very long distance away? I mean, who came up with this form of torture, anyway? 😐


  3. I say go for it, forget the golf and lay down quietly to enjoy the sun💕


  4. Tom Merriman says:

    My ball would never reach that beach, Col, never mind the water. It would take me a month to even hit it with that cue thingy. I’m not too good at golf…


    • colonialist says:

      Actually, the blob on the end of the stick is quite a good size and whacking the pill with it isn’t that hard. Hitting it anywhere near the direction it’s supposed to go is another matter entirely.


  5. equinoxio21 says:

    Gowf is a mist-eerie to me.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. The Asian says:

    You almost have a birdie eye view there


  7. LOL! Too many clever rhymes here already, so I’ll simply note the following: There’s a reason why golf is ‘flog’ spelled backward. But as long as I can get over the desire to herd the ball toward the hole, it’s a lovely excuse to walk around enjoying the scenery!


    • colonialist says:

      I do like that backward view!
      Crazy game, actually. You swat this blob using unwieldy instruments until it goes into a hole, but instead of heaving a sigh of relief you promptly lift it out again and start swatting towards another one. Generally attention is focussed on the blob and participants seems oblivious of the scenery.

      Liked by 2 people

  8. Arkenaten says:

    An in-the-rough draft, I see? How long wood it take to iron out all the problems?

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Patrecia (with an E) says:

    Now that is a brilliant idea


  10. adeeyoyo says:

    Hahahaha, isn’t it a joke where the rhyming leads us! Love the last line Col.


  11. disperser says:

    Shouldn’t that be “piddle”?


  12. With a few inks
    in the links
    you could have it all.


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