The Really Awful Modern Degeneration

Can’t be without it to be with it.

 

If you would join the factions
Within the modern age,
There are some vital actions
In which you should engage,
Do get some nasty pigments
To pin into your skin —
Imagination figments —
On torso, arm or shin.

(These used to be confined to
Bad villains from the East,
Or those who were inclined to
Go out to sea; deceased,
To recognise the latter,
When bodies wash ashore,
Is an important matter —
And that’s where tattoos score.)

Apart from such, to make you
Feel utterly unique,
Some other habits take you
To a conforming freak —
Don’t listen to good music,
A beat is all you need;
And books that you must choose? Stick
To comics — if you read

Foul up your speech to utter,
Between each group of words,
Expressions from the gutter,
Involving, often, turds;
And adjectives and adverbs
Must be replaced, to vex,
By one of truly bad verbs,
Denoting having sex.

Get lips and nostrils garnished,
And belly-buttons, too,
With rings that, when they’re tarnished,
Can cause quite a to-do,
(Especially if placing
Them quite a lot more south —
More trouble you’d be facing
Than were they on the mouth!)

From second time of meetings,
The very fondest hugs
Administer as greetings;
Experiment with drugs;
Talk sport when you’re conversing,
Cars, latest TV show,
Or scandal be rehearsing,
And you will be all go!

© February 2016 Colonialist (WordPress)