Robert’s Rules of Disorder, Really Awful

Gen’ral Robert, it is clear we need yer
Update on some Rules for the Procedure
Parliamentary meetings now should stick to —
Quite a number, now, you need to flick through

When one’s rising on a Point of Silence,*
Or when rising on the Point of Violence,
Can the Chair continue speaking rudely,
Or get bully-boys to rush in crudely?

When attacked by orderlies, white-coated,
Can a Point of Elbow then be floated?**
Or, when to the door with you they’re hiking,
Fist on Point of Chin can rise for striking?

Should a rising point of middle finger
Be a custom now allowed to linger?
(This translates the same when shown as deaf-word);
Can the Members also use the F-word?

Is the Chair in order when declaring
Those in breach of rules should get a hearing?
Or that Points of Order, where there’s no doubt,
Can be ruled not being such, and thrown out?

Can the rules of Parliament be flouted,
And police on premises not outed?
When no Call to Order has been ordered
It’s OK no order is recorded?

I am sure that all these innovations
Will come into force with all the nations;
All it needs is simplest of decisions —
Bring in these South African revisions.

*Proposed by an opposition party in memory of mental patients killed by negligent action. Suggestions for a moment’s silence were refused, but they rose anyway.

** One lady was using her elbow to particularly good effect.

It is obvious from these happenings during the State of the Nation Address by the President that the State is a sorry one indeed.

© January 2017 Colonialist