It’s elementary, my dear:
What’s pictured on your sporting gear
With no colonialist show
Should there, on any portion, go;
The Springboks came from bad old days,
But now a bloke who cricket plays
Must as a Protea be known —
And yet, thereby it can be shown
The British influence remains
Which is what SA now disdains;
Just name a country most ‘Pro Tea’ –
Yes, surely, that must Britain be?
South Africa is left behind
On names, and they now need to find
A Zim- or Zam-type label for
The country that we all adore;
A zany one has come to mind …
Azania one’s hard to find!
Tanzania is where you go
To, though, for stranger tan to show?
So, maybe, Guptazumaland
Would sound sufficiently grand
And neatly get the message through
Of who is now in charge of who.
Colonial place-names are out,
And there are sorry squeals about
The spelling used for some of those
For which the Zulu names they chose;
So Empangeni, we now hear
As Embangweni should appear,
And Umthwalume, rearrange:
To uMthwalumi it must change,
And so eliminating these
Colonialist legacies! —
But colonists, they should recall,
Brought in the art to spell at all.