Medical Musical Mutters

I scan do!

(S)Canned Music

(Sung in a mournful minor key)

I must now relate
Once more had a date
For that awful fate
To sit there and wait
For jabs of some dye
To take hold, is why,
Until I could lie
For scans bye and bye.

Before, came more jabs,
Creating some scabs,
While blood the nurse nabs
To test in the Labs;
Then had to take drink
(For an hour, I think,)
Until on the brink
Of flushing down sink.

And, once in that maw,
How I do adore
To lie in the raw
(Just gown me before);
Machine clanks and creaks,
The noise me quite freaks —
Becoming antiques,
Such fate one now seeks.

At times, not to breathe
Instructions receive,
And you won’t believe
How that make one grieve!
While holding back urge
To scratch on . . . one’s verge;
Suppressing a surge
Of sputum to purge.

But it is such fun
To hear, in long run,
‘That’s it, you are done,’
And out comes the sun;
Two different machines
Had these kinds of scenes,
One: CT had means,
And one: X-ray leans.

Tomorrow, guess what?
Appointment I’ve got
It is my sad lot —
Look forward, I’m not —
The Neuro to see
For his third degree,
And then drip to be
Injected in me.

(Switching to a merry major)

But lest it forefend
I go round the bend
I should only tend
To go back at end
Next month for a new
Appointment to do,
And then, it is true,
No scans to pursue.

© June 2019 Colonialist