Golf a la Carte


The Bluff National Park Golf Club

We lunched at the Golf Club today;
Of golf cart I got in the way;
It struck me then strongly
How thinking is wrongly,
And shouldn’t belong-ry,
To have such things brought into play:
For walking that ought
To be part of the sport
For fitness support,
Is no longer going to stay,
And torsos that swing
Are the only thing
That, given a fling,
Some exercise getting just may —
While they still enjoy fullest sway,
The rest will just wither away.

© October 2019 Colonialist
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Posted in Africa, Colonialist, Humorous rhyme, Personal Journal, Really Awful Rhyme | Tagged , , | 8 Comments

Take Me To Your Leader . . .


Guess what Rhiannon came home with today . . .

That is now nicely balancing up her two Academic Merit badges for the year.

Posted in Africa | 9 Comments

Taps & The Last Post


Latest posts strange patterns show,
About which one needs to know,
Things I find of interest are,
Found to give out ‘No cigar!’

Seems to me, advancing age
Hardly senses will engage;
Far more popular the try:
Petrol refill that I buy.

Tales of quite unending woe
With success are sure to go,
While no current, new CDs
Have no skill at all to please.

From now on seems I must splurge
On one long unending dirge;
Kewt kittipix, and doggies too
Don’t mean all that much to you.

© October 2019 Colonialist
Posted in Blogging tip, Cats, Colonialist | 7 Comments

Happy Birthday to Me: and a Brief History.


One short of eighty years today
There came a great event,
For that is when there came our way
Yours truly, mischief bent;

To end of war, and more and more
Of conflicts through the years,
Through all absurdities the score
Of writings shifted gears

Apartheid came, apartheid went,
Mandela came, and left,
With time quite greatly spent,
And leaving actions deft.

Then came the sorry cry, Oh woe!
‘Bring on the clowns!’ it was,
That this was heeded, we all know,
Of Zuma time, because.

And now, in all of politics
A muddled monkey reigns —
Or mixed gorilla that one picks —
Eggs, bacon, wors the mains.

No doubt all will be keen to pounce
On racist statement there,
Which on their own heads back will bounce,
So grumble with great care.

For xenophobia’s OK
But racism is not,
The ‘foreigners’ all have a way
To get what you’ve not got?

So every white on black complaint
Is met with awful yells,
But black on black, or black/white ain’t —
Now, what is that one tells?

That I will still be seeing
The next eighty years pass by
Is quite unlikely being,
But keep your optics dry.

It has, so far, me given
A quite amazing ride,
To go on too long livin’,
Is action to deride.

But meantime still enjoying
The simple things in life,
Food for the tum, brain buoying
From family and wife.

Noshables, brainfodder, and permission (implied) to wear the pants!

 

© October 2019 Colonialist
Posted in Africa, Colonialist, Current Affairs, Humorous rhyme, Personal Journal, political satire, Really Awful Rhyme, Rhyme | Tagged , , , | 23 Comments

Wordle 424 — a Sinking Feeling


Year from scratch,
Line discount feared;
Finish safe with heat and patch;
Hull not granite; ship not geared
Single fire by coal-oil seared.

According to these findings, the Titanic had been on fire internally for some time before the sinking, and it has emerged that cost-cutting exercises occurred including a patch in the hull. This and other articles on the same theme make fascinating reading — and contribute nicely to my usual economical Wordle!

© October 2019 Colonialist

 

Posted in Really Awful Rhyme, Wordle | Tagged , | 6 Comments

Water Sound Investment


When sitting on our patio

There’s something always on the go:

Thanks to the water feature here

The sound of trickles rings out clear,

And I have tuned it to provide 

A really pleasant sound outside;

The only problem to arise

(With great regret I must advise)

Unless I manage it to soften,

It makes one ‘go’ now twice as often.

© October 2019 Colonialist
Posted in Africa, Personal Journal, Poems, Really Awful Rhyme | Tagged , , , | 12 Comments

Didja’ ever get one of them days, boy


My list of woes
Today you see
Is all that shows
Of misery,
Computer crashed,
The sound card gone,
So off I flashed 
To get back on.

Or, would have raced,
But car, the key
Could not be traced —
Oh, dearie me!
And only spare
Won’t stop alarm,
So then and there
Does ears some harm.

Deaf, finally, 
Got underway,
And went to see
What they would say;
They tried to get
An easy fix
But just got met
With tricky tricks

With trials obscene
I time then spent,
And in between
My garments rent,
The more they tried
To make it purr,
The deeper fried 
The innards were.

Well, in the end
They got it done;
Near round the bend.
I then moved on;
Replace, next chore,
For car and gate,
Both keys, but more
Grief was my fate.

Gate key was made
At second try,
But car key stayed
On list passed by,
So I must care
For one I’ve got,
For now a spare
I have got — not!

And no remote
Means when I lock
I have to vote
For noisy shock
While I dive do,
The key to jab
Ignition through
Inside the cab.

For only left
Hand door will go;
One must be deft
And in the know
To find the need
To drive across
At super speed —
Or hearing loss!

So then, with sigh,
I have to say,
I tried to buy
Some duct-tape, gray,
Red, orange, red,
And shades of green,
Were all, to track,
That could be seen.

Watch number two
Then came to stop,
So batt’ry new
I’d need for op,
At any rate
I had a third
That I make wait
Upon my word.

Would you believe
That one, too, dead —
No good to grieve:
To jewellers sped;
They had to order
For both to seek,
A wait rewarder
Within a week.

..

One thing mayhap
I did do well
I gouged out strap
As you can tell,
And fitbit-kind
Of watch now shows
As neater, mind,
Than taped gave pose.

So home I came
To plug all in,
But sad the game
I couldn’t win!
Took ages for 
It to come right —
And on this score
I’ll say good night!

© October 2019 Colonialist
Posted in Humorous rhyme, Personal Journal, Really Awful Rhyme | Tagged , , , , | 30 Comments