Treasury Capture and Monkey Business …

Overheard in a Secret Meeting …

Z: But I don’t want G in the job. He won’t do the stuff I want him to.

A: Well, you’re stuck with him now.

Z: No, I’m not. Get your people working on digging up some dirt on him.

A: We’ve had a look, but there isn’t anything, really. No bribes, no corruption, no extravagances …

Z: There’s got to be something! What about that nasty unit he set up in Revenue Service that had us all so scared?

A: I don’t know if that was exactly illegal.

Z: Well, dig through the laws until you find something to make it that way. Come on, man, if you search properly you can even find a section or two to make blowing your nose illegal. And what about that guy who went on pension and came back as a consultant? Aren’t there any clauses anywhere that would make that do?

A: OK, OK, I’ll get a bigger team on it.

Z: And whatever they come up with, you and I will have had nothing to do with it, understand?


Following on public perception that a conversation on these lines must have occurred, Zapiro published this cartoon.


Immediately there was outrage — not that the Public Prosecuting Authority’s head honcho was depicted as a puppet, but that the form taken was to show him as an organ-grinder’s monkey. This immediately made it racist. For crying in a bucket! People of all sizes, shapes, colours, races and religions are referred to as monkeys when they are seen to behave as such, and the one belonging to the organ-grinder is an old established stereotype. Are we to assume that if the cartoon had shown a puppet instead, it wouldn’t have been racist? And if it was racist, why wasn’t the President shown as a monkey? Objectors are being ridiculous, and Zapiro should never have conceded that there was anything anyone but a total idiot would regard as racist in his clever cartoon.

Anyway, I feel a Really Awful Rhyme coming on …

Our President, at any cost,
Must stay in office or be lost,
For, should his term of office fail,
Then he might serve a term in jail?

He dodges this with dizzy swerves —
Though it’s no more than he deserves —
Most definitely, he would fain
Remain upon his gravy-train.

Alternative, with half a brain,
Is seen as going down the drain,
So he must find a handy thug
To scrub the pulling of the plug.

The wrecked economy you see
Is due to dictum, ‘Me, me, me!’
‘It’s for the Party,’ each declares,
But parties funded — are all theirs.

For parties and a spending spree
From taxes paid they get for free,
But when it comes to fixing stuff
They say the funds are not enough.

So if illicit cash you crave,
But aren’t particularly brave,
Ensure jail-time is never spent —
Just be elected President!

© October 2016 Colonialist (WordPress)
Posted in Africa, Really Awful Rhyme, Satire | Tagged , , , , , | 5 Comments

On the Avenue (Not 5th or Delderfield)











Who would plant along the way a thousand trees that thrive from birth?

We spent time without a break to delve this avenue;

How is it stricken trees bounce back — are they even of this earth?

Some tell of magic spell to wake and make revival true.


My usual personal challenge of using the words in the order given, and rhyming with as few added as possible.  I had an even shorter version, but the sense required a great leap of intuition to extract.

Here follows another little avenue which is part of  one of the gardens we judged this weekend for Garden of the Year. More pictures of those will follow in due course.


© October 2016 Colonialist (WordPress)
Posted in Africa, Challenge, Gardens, Rhyme, Wordle | Tagged , , , | 11 Comments

Shines of the Times



Here is all the Shine you’d wish —
And it comes with lots of fish.




When conditions aren’t so bright
Home is what will bring de-light!

© October 2016 Colonialist (WordPress)
Posted in Africa, Humorous rhyme, photo challenge, Photography, Really Awful Rhyme, Weekly Photo Challenge | Tagged , , , | 5 Comments

Opportunities Gained and Lost

My day was sabotaged, in between normal collection-from-school and pool cleaning and editing tasks, by the observation by Much Better Half that a drain kept drizzling although rain had only reigned some time ago.  This led me to wonder if my existing ladder could conceivably get me up far enough to inspect the gutter. To my surprise it did, and I cleared out piles of gunge that were blocking the pipe and making a pond up there.

This had me wondering if the ladder would possibly also reach the sensor of a light previously operated by movement detection which is a great help when we go down to the cottage after dark.  It stopped working when our painter was overenthusiastic with a pressure cleaner in that area.  I discovered with further surprise that from the top of the ladder, and clinging to a handy pipe sticking out of the wall, I could actually reach it …

Much testing followed.  The light fittings were fine. I had previously inspected them, because they are lower and far easier to reach. Using my handy remote voltage tester (it goes ‘pip-pip-pip’ when placed near a live wire) I established there was current running to the sensor, so it was obviously defective. With some impressive feats of balancing, I managed to break it loose. The screws securing it were beyond any hope of turning. Then I bridged the connection. Voila! A light which was switch-onable-and-offable from inside!  Taped the connector, and tucked it under a beam.  Another sensor can go in later, if the mood takes me.

It was then time to take R to a Swimming Squad gala — her mother was at a meeting. The evening was cold, windy and unpleasant, but the event has been put off twice already, so the school persisted.  R did creditably, if unplaced, in backstroke and breaststroke, but my pictures didn’t turn out too well.  I geared myself up for her freestyle event, and took a brilliant sequence from dive to a finish in second place. I was just packing my camera away with a satisfied smirk when I heard some other parents yelling, ‘Come on R; go R!’  The kid I had watched was of similar build and from the same house, but had been in the event previous to R’s!

Long before I could get my camera out again, she completed the race. In first place. Aaaargh!

Oh well. Here is another shot from the Benvie garden featured in my previous post.


© October 2016 Colonialist (WordPress)


Posted in DIY, Grandchildren, Humour, Personal Journal, Photography, Swimming | Tagged , , , | 19 Comments

A stroll in a tiny garden …


‘Benvie’ is a garden in the KwaZulu Natal Midlands, at Karkloof some 15 Km beyond Howick, which was established in 1882 by a Scottish immigrant cabinet maker, John Geekie. Naturally (haha) his interest was mainly in trees, and there are some really old conifers and eucalypts.  Some of the latter (mountain ash) have a circumference of some seven metres.  However, his garden allowed space for sweeping lawns, and vivid colour is added by, mainly, rhododendrons and azaleas.  There are also water features and a stream, and birds abound.

You might imagine that this would have taken some space, and probably expect a couple of acres, or a hectare? Actually, the garden occupies some 30 hectares, or 74 acres! The ‘stroll’ on the main path open to visitors is about two kilometres long.  Arrangements to view can be made with John Geekie’s great granddaughter, in residence.

Our visit just over a week ago was part of my birthday celebration, and we started with lunch at Yellowwood Café just outside Howick, which has a distant view of Howick Falls, boasts farm animals including a miniature horse  (a pig bit young R, but she was careless) yellowwood-cafe

as well as some buck which had left the scene before I got my camera ready, and donkeys in football jerseys. yellowwood-zebra

On to a small selection of the pictures I took of  the garden:


benvie-hedge benvie-below-car-park benvie-pond-1 benvie-pond-2 benvie-pond-3 benvie-woods

Finally, we returned via a stop for afternoon tea at The Farmer’s Daughter on the outskirts of Howick which boasts this view of a branch of the gorge into which the falls plunge.gorge-from-farmers-daughter

© October 2016 Colonialist (WordPress)
Posted in Africa, Excursiohs, Gardens, Nature, Personal Journal, Photography | Tagged , , , , | 22 Comments

Fatal flash





To mimic kick may fade; but insulate

From park, to where flash got into state

To spin on rim and flip

Stepped over line, with way past limit trip.

© October 2016 Colonialist (WordPress)
Posted in Poems, Rhyme, Wordle | Tagged , , | 1 Comment

Localities … locali-tease … localit-ease …


If our Local you would see,
Here is one locality,
Down the road, in easy reach,
It is known as Kiya Beach.


And another, not too far,
Point Yacht Club is where we are.


Show our little cottage, let’s —
That’s as local as it gets!

© October 2016 Colonialist (WordPress)
Posted in Africa, Beach, Challenge, Colonialist, Photography, Really Awful Rhyme, Weekly Photo Challenge | Tagged , , | 16 Comments