
This is the completion of the fence-heightening exercise. I tried filling in the gaps with more slats, but everyone said that made it look like a construction-site screen, so we’ll just have to wait for the creeper to do the job.
NaPoWriMo today
Says that poets all may
Do traffic with graphic
Attempts that are Sapphic,
And, therefore, I have this to say:
Sapphic poems are such that pretention needs must
take to the fore to the exclusion of sense;
thus the value in them is thoroughly bust –
be one bright or dense.*
broken, the cadence
*In comments on NaPoWriMo Day 12 Post, Vince Gotera quite rightly pointed out that the last line does not follow the required meter of a true-key and a ducktail. Not to late to do a repair! As for iffy bits which crept into the preceding part to accommodate my compulsive rhyming – they can stay!
For some arcane reason (being devoid of inspiration) I came back to this, with the idea of writing a Sapphic Ode. I read the instructions on the Napo page, but they didn’t add up:Trochee Trochee Dactyl Dactyl makes 10 syllables not 11. Then I read the example given and the rhythm sounded lumpy to me. Do you think it’s OK to cheat?
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Should be:
Trochee, trochee, dactyl, trochee, trochee.
DAH-dum, DAH-dum, DAH-dum-dum, DAH-dum, DAH-dum – eleven.
‘This would be my model of Sapphic meter.’
(I tried ‘This would be my model of how to do it’, but the stress on ‘how’ would still be iffy.)
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Yes, I noticed my error and edited my blog post accordingly. I still find the rhythm lumpy!
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This was hilarious! I’m so glad you were featured and I found this post!
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Happy indeed that you found it amusing! Levity is, rather, my thing!
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I counted the syllables and got three, maybe four stanzas that way — but as for the meter, forget it. 🙂
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It certainly isn’t a meter I would go for by choice! Complex and innately pompous.
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Amazing, biting and insightful about the shortcomings of meter .usinng meter!
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Thanks! Actually, I like regular meter and rhymes, but they do require careful handling or they turn round and bite you.
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Brilliant!!!
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Thank you kindly for that observation!
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*blushing* Sorry, was in a rush earlier… Really enjoyed your poetic put down of a form I couldn’t even get half way with! It made me smile, and I needed a smile today! (Better? :))
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Did my response come across as sarcastic? It wasn’t meant as such. A ‘brilliant’. sincerely meant, is a real compliment!
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It was sincerely meant, but I didn’t take your come-back as sarcastic as much as mildly amused by this stranger who runs in, throws out a ‘brilliant’ and rushes out again…
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Better by far than those who rush in and out leaving only an additional ‘visit’ pegged up on one’s stats!
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I actually used to read your stuff a lot back when I was last reading stuff… And I know what you mean by those anonymous visitors… I had a spike of 62 views in an hour the other day (WordPress tells me my average is about 2 views/hour)… Five views on six different posts (or something like that) in that one hour, but no comments, no likes, no nothing… Made me wonder what on earth I was doing wrong and why they read me if they didn’t like me! Or if I should get ready to be hacked! *smile*
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You both might enjoy Timi’s post today:
https://livelytwist.wordpress.com/2015/04/12/wordpress-108-liking-following-or-not/
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I’m glad to see you had the same opinion of the form I did. I managed one verse, but had no way to follow it up. Yours takes it much less seriously than mine did, which seems to be the way to go! Congrats on being featured. 🙂
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I see other poets have made quite a good job of it, but it isn’t my ‘thing’!
Thanks for congrats and for giving me the first inkling I had that I have been featured! It was utterly unexpected!
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It’s going to look great with the vine all over it Col. In the meantime the girls can have fun by hanging their own flower pots there. 😀
Don’t work too hard now you hear. How’s the leg doing?
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Indeed; for the time being hanging containers are the way to go!
The leg is progressing, thanks – nearly right!
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I am very glad to hear that Col. Take care and have a lovely week. 😀
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lol
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Sounds like you’re enjoying the “challenges” of NaPoWriMo. Maybe you can do a “Don’t Fence Me In” poem? 😉
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I do like the starry sky above and lots of land! 🙂
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That’s a high fence. I just hope it can’t be used as a ladder. I think I might just be able to scale it. 🙂
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I’m sure you could! But not quickly, and especially not if being potted at!
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Hahaha. I’ll stay clear, Col. 😯
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Sappho, Lesbos…… strange person, people and poetry.
I prefer reading more about the tall fence. Plant some sweet smelling jasmine there.
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You must be psychic! Jasmine is that wispy bit on the tallest section, being trained to find its way down! More will be planted at the base.
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That fence looks awfully high. I can just see the adventurous toddler climbing it and running out of grip at the top. I agree with your poem. Pretentious poetry is practically unreadable.
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Oops – now that you mention it, I can see young 3-yr-old J having a bash. Mind you, she is good at keeping a grip on things when high up.
I do like poetry to have a rhythm, often provided by meter and rhyme. It takes a craftsman of note to keep full sense and beauty intact within such constraints, though.
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