REALLY AWFUL PRAWN COCK-TALES


Prawnatic

Prawn

YOUNG PRAWN

An oceanographer, one sunny day,
Decided to study the prawn;
Developing quite an obsession that way,
Took pictures from breaking of dawn
To late in the night,
And still got it right
To get, on the Net,
A lot more pics yet
Of both nymph and nymphet
,
So quite a collection was born;
But this sideline from oceanography
Was horribly destined to fail –
He was promptly accused of prawnography,
And so he was hauled off to jail!

Prawnpositioned

PRAWN

PRAWN

“Prawn; co-owns a major bank;
Seeks someone to share it.
She said, ‘Is this ad. a prank? –
I think I should dare it!’

So she answered it that day;
Quickly was replied:
‘Meet me on the fifth of May –
Durban beach: south-side.’

Eagerly she travelled there,
To the rendezvous;
Looked about her with due care,
Wondering just who …

Came, from sandbank out at sea,
Prawn of goodly sort;
Squinted round perplexedly –
Sight of her he caught!

Love, though, wasn’t going to strike,
For both sets of eyes
Showed their mutual dislike,
Mixed with great surprise.

‘Curse it!’ he said, all forlorn,
‘This is really blown!
You’re a blessed Parktown Prawn*
I just might have known!’

PARKTOWN PRAWN

PARKTOWN PRAWN

Snorted she disgustedly,
‘I’m on the wrong wicket –
This romance is all at sea –
Simply isn’t cricket!’
 

© Colonialist August 2007  (Blogs 24.com) October 2013 (WordPress)


*Very large type of cricket, found particularly in Parktown, Johannesburg

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About colonialist

Active septic geranium who plays with words writing fantasy novels and professionally editing, with notes writing classical music, and with riding a mountain bike, horses and dinghies.
This entry was posted in Humour, Really Awful Rhyme, Writing and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

29 Responses to REALLY AWFUL PRAWN COCK-TALES

  1. The Asian says:

    I don’t mind the first two prawns but the last one would send me running very quickly in the opposite direction

    Like

  2. bluebee says:

    PS – are you sure you’re taking antibiotics and not LSD?

    Like

  3. bluebee says:

    Nothing blessed about a Parktown Prawn – one thing about SA, I definitely don’t miss – give me a redback any day…

    Like

  4. adeeyoyo says:

    I have only seen one – and it was dead (thank goodness!). I have heard all the awful stories of trying to move them, or kill them (preferably) and don’t know what I would do if one came inside. Maybe someone should start a new company de(a)dicated to getting rid of the things.

    Like

  5. Pussycat44 says:

    That’s a good one for my retirement home’s inhabitants: prawnography.
    No roaches, no Parktown Prawns, no further rain spiders, just lots of bees feeding from the fallen jacaranda flowers. Life’s good! xxx

    Like

  6. Those Parktown Prawns really give me the heebie jeebies. Prawnography eh? 😯

    Like

  7. Kathleen says:

    Hahaha… prawnography. 😉 Nicely done Col.

    Like

  8. adinparadise says:

    Oh Horrors! I thought I’d escaped from these scariest of goggas, but apparently not. 😀

    Like

  9. disperser says:

    I actually read those . . . not usual for poetry.

    . . . but I do like me crustacean puns.

    Like

  10. Colline says:

    So funny 😀
    Ooh, never liked those Parktown Prawns (shudder)

    Like

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