Prawnatic
An oceanographer, one sunny day,
Decided to study the prawn;
Developing quite an obsession that way,
Took pictures from breaking of dawn
To late in the night,
And still got it right
To get, on the Net,
A lot more pics yet
Of both nymph and nymphet,
So quite a collection was born;
But this sideline from oceanography
Was horribly destined to fail –
He was promptly accused of prawnography,
And so he was hauled off to jail!
Prawnpositioned
“Prawn; co-owns a major bank;
Seeks someone to share it.”
She said, ‘Is this ad. a prank? –
I think I should dare it!’
So she answered it that day;
Quickly was replied:
‘Meet me on the fifth of May –
Durban beach: south-side.’
Eagerly she travelled there,
To the rendezvous;
Looked about her with due care,
Wondering just who …
Came, from sandbank out at sea,
Prawn of goodly sort;
Squinted round perplexedly –
Sight of her he caught!
Love, though, wasn’t going to strike,
For both sets of eyes
Showed their mutual dislike,
Mixed with great surprise.
‘Curse it!’ he said, all forlorn,
‘This is really blown!
You’re a blessed Parktown Prawn*
I just might have known!’
Snorted she disgustedly,
‘I’m on the wrong wicket –
This romance is all at sea –
Simply isn’t cricket!’
© Colonialist August 2007 (Blogs 24.com) October 2013 (WordPress)
*Very large type of cricket, found particularly in Parktown, Johannesburg
I don’t mind the first two prawns but the last one would send me running very quickly in the opposite direction
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The Parktown edition is a bumper one, for sure!
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PS – are you sure you’re taking antibiotics and not LSD?
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No, can’t be LSD because it gives me a sink instead of a lift!
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Nothing blessed about a Parktown Prawn – one thing about SA, I definitely don’t miss – give me a redback any day…
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Whatever a redback may be!
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I have only seen one – and it was dead (thank goodness!). I have heard all the awful stories of trying to move them, or kill them (preferably) and don’t know what I would do if one came inside. Maybe someone should start a new company de(a)dicated to getting rid of the things.
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It is part of the ethnic scene up there. How can you suggest trying to wipe them out? 🙂
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That’s a good one for my retirement home’s inhabitants: prawnography.
No roaches, no Parktown Prawns, no further rain spiders, just lots of bees feeding from the fallen jacaranda flowers. Life’s good! xxx
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It sounds so-o-o-o boring! 🙂
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If lack of nunu’s is boring, so be it. I have other things, and people to brighten up my day 😉
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Think how much more your day would be brightened by the reaction of the people to the introduction of a strategic nunu! 🙂
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Those Parktown Prawns really give me the heebie jeebies. Prawnography eh? 😯
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I should have X-rated the post!
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Hahaha… prawnography. 😉 Nicely done Col.
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Thanks! I was obviously overfed on prawns at the time!
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Oh Horrors! I thought I’d escaped from these scariest of goggas, but apparently not. 😀
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Funny how people are more petrified of them than of many of the itsy bitsy spiders which are REALLY nasty!
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I actually read those . . . not usual for poetry.
. . . but I do like me crustacean puns.
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I am honoured!
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So funny 😀
Ooh, never liked those Parktown Prawns (shudder)
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They are a bit much, size-wise, aren’t they?
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They are. When I came into contact with them, I would ask someone else to move them out of the house!
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Dead or alive!
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Wow you are on form!
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It is showing past form – I’ve been too busy (and suffering from a cold which has moved its favourite armchair in) to create new stuff!
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Aggenee
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Dis wat ek DOEN!
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🙂
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